"A Christmas Invitation"

Matt. 2:10

Looking for a reason to live 

Through tear-covered lenses 

Longing for a voice to explain 

What my soul cannot express.

And the barricade of past regrets 

With shackles made by bitterness 

Have walled me in this prison deep 

Falling victim to its deadly sleep.

Is there a droplet of hope 

Amidst the ruins I do lie in? 

These ashes that I hold

Are just remains of my dreams.

Then faint echoes of my childhood years 

Repeat messages when God came near 

Jesus' love came down in infant form

To love and die for those who scorned.

He is the Prince of Peace

For the soul bound with torment 

He is the Creator of all

When destruction's  all you see.

There's not a portion of your life

He can't redeem and bring out beauty 

Not a place where sin's too dark

That His Light of grace can't reach.

Then the barricades of past regrets 

Become memorials to His tenderness 

And shackles from that prison deep

Will lie broken as you've been set free.

You'll find a reason to live

Through the eyes of your Savior

You'll have a voice to explain

How your soul has been possessed...

By the love sent down from heaven

A Father's gift for all mankind,

Eternal life lay in that manger

Behold the joy at Christmas time.

Hope's Demise: A Parable

There was a day when Hope no longer answered the door when Pain came knocking. Pain was a faithful visitor who'd come calling each morning as Consciousness arose, enlightening the eyes. Sometimes, he'd bring his companions Self Pity, Depression, Fear or Discouragement. On days when Pain's voice seemed especially loud and demanding, he'd bring along a deadly comrade named Despair and overstay his welcome.

Welcome? Yes...Pain was welcomed by Hope because Acceptance and Faith dwelled within and they knew Pain was always laden with treasures. He might hide the gift beneath his thorn-rimmed cap, within his thistle-filled pockets, underneath foreboding wrappings or nestled in the center of his filthy, tight-fisted grip. But when Pain visited Hope, the treasure outweighed his light and momentary affliction.

But this particular day...Hope didn't answer the door. As Consciousness sank the evening before and Pain made its temporary exit, Despair had slipped in unaware and hid within the shadows.

In the midnight hour, Despair found the bedside of Faith and drew close to his ear. He began to sing melancholy songs of doubt and disbelief that infiltrated Faith's beloved sleep, turning dreams into disparaging fogs of defeat. Every melody was haunting in its heaviness and when Faith stirred restless,  Despair's rhythmic lullabies of Giving In and Giving Up would send him back to slumber. Finally, Faith's face lost his color and his breathing took on a death rattle.

Despair quickly made his way down the hall to find Acceptance sleeping on a cot right next to the front door. His countenance was peaceful with an apparent joy that filled Despair with disgust. He reached into a bag and pulled out vials with various labels, such as "Unfair," "My rights," and "Don't deserve." He quickly filled a syringe with a cocktail of poisons specially designed to paralyze Acceptance with  bitterness. While the venom filled his veins, Acceptance's brow began to furrow, his lips tightened, and his previously opened hands were now clenched in a fist. "Victory" whispered the murderer.

Despair snapped his bag shut and stood to his feet with smug confidence. He slithered towards Hope's bed chambers and smiled at the silhouette of his enemy. With demonic pleasure he closed the door and locked it from the outside. It would be too strong for Hope alone to open. He imagined the morning's scenario as Hope would find itself barricaded and resisted at every attempt to escape. Eventually, Hope would be deferred and weakened to the degree that he would get sick and die like the others.

As Consciousness peered over housetops and flooded the valleys, a cackle was heard in the winds as Pain came knocking on someone else's door.

Prov. 13:12 "Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but when the desire comes, 

it is a tree of life."

Psalm 39:7 "And now, Lord, what do I wait for? My hope is in You."

Psalm 71:14 "But I will hope continually, And will praise You yet more and more."

1 Cor. 16:13 "Watch, stand fast in the faith, be brave, be strong."

Note to the reader: I wrote this parable after a day of praying for a precious friend of mine in dark depression. Just as Proverbs is personified in the Bible, the reality of pain, fear and despair took on characteristic roles and I seemed to watch their insidious actions carried out as you read above. A friend of mine said, "Shannon, that's so powerful, but very dark. Could you add light at the end?" This is why I put the verses. There are many more promises that God has made to us. They have truly become what Hebrews describes, "an anchor to my soul." One of my favorite verses is Isaiah 50:10, "Who among you fears the LORD and obeys the word of his servant? Let the one who walks in the dark, who has no light, trust in the name of the LORD and rely on their God."

A Birthday of Jubilee

I don't believe I have had a more hectic summer to date, therefore "blogging" has had to take a lower number on the priority totem pole. But I have a very precious friend who shared something amazing that the Lord has done in her life and I asked her to write a "guest post" for this blog. Only when I agreed to keep her anonymous and became more obnoxious than a nagging wife or dripping faucet did she finally agree to write.

So get blessed by this wonderful testimony of God's abundant love by an unknown, but well known, sister in Christ. Here's her story:

Year of Jubilee
 "An opening of the prison to one who was bound"- Isa. 61:1

I couldn't wait to turn forty! I really thought something magical would happen when the calendar page of my life turned from thirty nine to forty. I had been reading about the children of Israel wandering in the desert for forty years, savoring every word about them entering into the Promised Land, as though they had been written just for me. I began to see how significant the number forty was in the bible. It had rained forty days and forty nights, long before the ark's door could be opened on a new world. Jesus fasted for forty days and nights, before His public ministry began. So I was sure that something amazing was in store for me after thirty nine years of feeling like I had somewhat been walking in circles. But if anything, life just got harder and became more of a wilderness. 

I did not want to have the same expectation for turning fifty. I had learned to resign myself to much in my life. But I did love the verses in Leviticus 25 that described the Year of Jubilee. A decade earlier, I had printed those verses on cards to be displayed on tables for a friend's fiftieth birthday party. As the calendar page of my life was about to turn again, I thought I should look them up for myself. I realized that after the 49th year of coming into the land of promise, the Lord wanted to restore rest to the land and restore liberty to the enslaved. The poetry of those words caused me to write them in my bible with a silent prayer that He would do just that in my life. But I was too busy to give it much thought. 

Life had become like the teacup ride at Disneyland, spinning fast with activities, meetings, school, ministry, conferences, phone calls, emails, and of course, laundry!  I prided myself at how well I was keeping all the plates spinning in the air, and that none seemed to be dropping! From all outward appearances, I was at the peak of my game. Suddenly I crashed inwardly and outwardly. My teacup came to a standstill. I was unable to continue in almost anything that I had become so good at doing. It was in that still place the Lord began to speak to me, putting His loving finger on different places deep in my heart, gently saying, "What about this?" 

One of the first things He showed me through His Word came when a friend shared with me from Acts 12, I was in a prison where I was bound with chains between two soldiers. I could clearly see what my prison was, and the chains that held me there, but like Peter, I did not see any way out. Then the Lord spoke clearly to me from Hosea 2 that He was going to bring me into the wilderness and allure me, speak comfort to me, show me His lovingkindness, mercy, and faithfulness as a husband, not a master. 

So now back into the wilderness I had wanted to escape from in my forties, He completely overwhelmed me with His love. He began waking me in the early morning hours just to be with Him. His Word began to come alive to me as never before, and songs of worship would pour into my heart. Nothing mattered anymore but those times alone with the Lord when He would speak to me. I realized all I had lost in the whirlwind my life had become. Immersed in ministry, I had lost Jesus Himself. 

He then began to gently walk me through my life, showing me that even as a young girl, l had let others form my beliefs of what He thought of me, and had been looking at myself through their eyes. They had become bigger than God in my mind and their thoughts and opinions controlled my life, often with fear and shame. But even these revelations did not set me free. I was still enslaved in a prison and I could see no way out. 

Layer after layer in my heart was being revealed and prayed over. I did not return to any of my former commitments. A friend started fasting for my deliverance. But I could not even see what my freedom was supposed to look like. Then, as sudden as the crash that brought me to a complete standstill five months earlier, the miraculous happened! 


Jesus did not just overwhelm me with His love, He flooded my heart with His glory. I was simply reading Psalm 24:7 - "Lift up your heads, O you gates! And be lifted up, you everlasting doors, and the King of glory SHALL come in!" At that moment, the iron gates of my heart flung open of their own accord, the King of Glory shone His marvelous light, and the chains fell off. (Acts 12:7,10) I knew what was happening in my heart, the joy and presence of the Holy Spirit was so real. But the real test came, when I immediately found that what others thought or said of me no longer mattered. I was free from the chains I had let man place on me. Free from the finger pointing of the past and the present. He had simply opened the gates of my heart to receive His glory and I was free to walk out.

In my forty ninth year I had prayed a prayer of restoration and deliverance without even seeing my prison. Now in my Year of Jubilee, I believe I have finally just entered the Land of Promise, unshackled! A prisoner no more. Rejoice with me and let the gates of your own heart swing open to receive the King of Glory who loves to set us free!

Isaiah 45:2 I will go before you and make the crooked places straight, I will break in pieces the gates of bronze, and cut the bars of iron. 

Psalm 107:16 For He has broken the gates of bronze, and cut the bars of iron in two. 

Isaiah 54:12 I will make your pinnacles of rubies, your gates of crystal, and all your walls of precious stones. 

Isaiah 58:6 Is this not the fast that I have chosen: To loose the bonds of wickedness, to undo heavy burdens, to let the oppressed go free, and that you break every yoke?

Isaiah 26:2,3 Open the gates, that the righteous nation which keeps the truth may enter in. For You will keep him in perfect peace whose mind is stayed on You, because He trusts in You. 

"Lest the Lord Protect"

"Wow it's hot! Stinky and sticky isn't it punkin'?" I asked my daughter as I scrunched up my nose and squinted to make light of the miserable temperature. I shouldn't teach her how to complain but my brain had melted somewhere around "Aisle J" in the grocery parking lot and most of my southern manners were attached.

I opened every door of our van to let the heat demons run free and checked if our "NY State Required" booster seat would fry her like a pancake. Assured of her safety, I carefully hoisted her preschool frame into the van, shoved a bottle of water in her lap and launched the air conditioning while I slid into my own leather skillet up front. Mindless music played in the background while coherence slowly returned in accordance with the cooling temperature. 

Twenty minutes later, as I rounded the last corner before home, my daughter let out the most horrifying, window-shattering scream I'd ever heard from her since infancy. I nearly jerked the wheel off the dashboard while maternal instincts hit the brakes, swerved off the road, dodged a ditch and brought the car to a swift halt. I whipped off my seat belt and swung around half out of breath, "What's wrong?! What happened Madigan?!"

Her tiny tears seemed to synchronize with her quivering bottom lip. "You didn't buckle my seat belt Mommy."

If I hadn't seen the genuine fear in her eyes, I might have given her one of the numerous lectures mothers give to typically over-dramatic children. But...she was scared. She looked down and realized that I hadn't done all I could to keep her safe and secure and her vulnerability frightened her.

You can imagine how quickly I got up, wrapped my arms around her, spoke assurances of my love, dried the tears and then buckled her safely in. But I made sure she looked right into my eyes when I said, "Mommy will sometimes make mistakes. But God is your Protector and He will never let anything happen to you unless it's part of His plan. He loves you the most and kept you safe almost the whole way home, didn't He?!" She smiled agreeably and my blood pressure began to rescind, so I swung back around and gave an over-sized sigh of relief. My thought's immediately echoed a slight variation of Psalm 127:1 "Lest YOU Lord, protect this child, I labor in vain to protect her." Thank you...again.

When I pulled into the driveway, she said reflectively "He's my Father too Mommy." This time, I bounced a smile in return to her as I realized she had to have been thinking about what I'd been telling her for the past several days; that our God is also our Father. At different times and in various ways, I'd been sharing with her the Daddy heart of God that provides, watches over, instructs, corrects, never leaves, never forgets, and so loves that she never needs to be afraid.

I've realized that it doesn't take too much in life for me to have a sudden sense of vulnerability. Life can be going along at such a high speed that I'm certain the next bump in the road or unexpected curve is going to sending me flying. I can look around at my circumstances and think that the Lord hasn't done all He possibly could to "secure me" and make sure of my safety in lieu of the potential for harm or pain. Fear can come so easily when I lack the assurance of the Lord's love and care.

"Fear not, little flock; for it is your Father's good 

pleasure to give you the kingdom." Luke 12:32

"For I the Lord your God will hold your right hand, 

saying to you, Fear not; I will help you." Isa. 41:13


"For ye have not received the spirit of bondage again to fear; but ye have received the Spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, Abba, Father" Rom. 8:15

"See what kind of love the Father has given to us, 

that we should be called children of God; and so we are." 1 John 3:1a

Treasure Among Thorns

I jumped out of the van, donned my not-so-stylish gardening gloves and walked confidently to a conglomerate of black raspberry bushes. I'd been warned that getting to the berries would not be easy due to years of neglect in keeping the weeds out and trimming back the branches. But the value of the berries outweighed my imagined discomfort at wading past whatever the curse might have birthed.


I noticed that the perimeter of the bushes held clusters of "easy pluckers." I had ravaged several of the branches before realizing that my gloves had made the force of my touch so insensitive, that I'd accidentally crushed most of those poor guys. There they lay bleeding their purple dye all over the bottom of the bowl while a tiny snail stayed dormant in its protective portable home. 


"Well, that wasn't smart," I mumbled to myself while tearing the scapegoats off my hands.


As the breeze began to pick up, it tossed the prickly weeds and fruit branches from side to side and revealed the buried treasure in the center. Shiny black and pleasantly plump raspberries, twice the size as the bludgeoned bunch in my bowl, filled up the core and invited my hands to come. Since I couldn't reach them from where I was standing, I carefully stepped into a portion of the heavily thorned bush and leaned over as far as I could reach. 


Then it happened. A strong gust of wind blew and whipped every surrounding branch of that bush so hard that I was completely encased by nature's built-in security system. The thorns stuck, punctured, poked, prodded and scraped every exposed area of skin from head to toe. The areas I had clothes on were snared with a Velcro grip making a quick escape impossible.


I've been attacked by opponents in sports, intimidated by bullies in school, even jumped by a drug-crazed teenager in Chicago. But to be ambushed by a squadron of black raspberry branches was a first. 

All I wanted was some fruit...was that so wrong? Wasn't that why they were planted years ago? The berries have medicinal, nutritional and sensational taste qualities for the eater to benefit from. But due to neglect of proper weeding and careful pruning, the sin-caused curse of "thorns, thistles and briers" left the fruit picker with speckled and striped wounds.


Jesus said in John 15:1-4 (NLT) "I am the true grapevine, and my Father is the gardener.² He cuts off every branch of mine that doesn’t produce fruit, and he prunes the branches that do bear fruit so they will produce even more. ³ You have already been pruned and purified by the message I have given you.  Remain in me, and I will remain in you. For a branch cannot produce fruit if it is severed from the vine, and you cannot be fruitful unless you remain in me."


In just four sentences, I'm reminded that my life, grafted in to the True grapevine, is designed to bear "fruit." That my heavenly Father has a love that never neglects, stops tending, nor ceases from pruning. His goal is that a life will produce more and more fruit and the pruning and washing process comes from the Word of God. It will cut and sever just as surely as it will wash, cleanse and heal. The gardener instructs "Just remain in Me" and you will bear fruit. Despite your growing in a sin-cursed world, surrounded by thorns and briers, when branches have been pruned properly, it bears abundant fruit readily available for the passerby. Fruit that is nourishing, healing, and satisfying to a hungry soul.

Remember that the Gardener's hands are sensitive to what He touches and knows the pressure He applies when fruit is plucked. He knows exactly where to cut a branch so that its amputation will produce more fruit than ever before...but "let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing." (James 1:4)

What's In My Eye?

I used to have a beautiful Bernese Mountain dog given to me several Christmas's ago by one of my most special friends. Once this puppy (named Charis) came into my life, I had a companion who never argued, always loved, and forced me to get into shape by her long walk needs.

I can't remember what I was doing one particular summer morning, but Charis had walked onto our small front porch and plopped down on the cement to get cooled off. She rotated around, flopped over a couple of times, then sat up, hung her paws over the front step and just stared at me. She wasn't yet two years old and her crimped puppy fur still infiltrated the area around her ears. I took the camera out of my purse and snapped a picture before she decided her rest was over.

Later that evening, when I uploaded the photos to my computer, I noticed that I could see my reflection in her eyes. How?

1. Her eyes were made with the capacity to reflect  
2. There was light
3. There was nothing in her eye, nor anything between us to block her view

Psalm 34:15a "The eyes of the LORD are on the righteous." 

I'm thinking of all the people I know who I would be able to see reflected in the eyes of the Lord.  

John 17:1 "Jesus...lifted up His eyes to heaven, and said: “Father..." 

Looking at Jesus, we see the Father filled His eyes.

Psalm 123:1 "I lift my eyes to you, O God, enthroned in heaven."

Psalm 25:15 "My eyes are always on the Lord."

If these verses are true of you, then I know Who I'd see looking into your eyes.

It's my prayer: Psalm 17:8a "Keep me as the apple of Your eye..."

It's important to remember: Matt. 7:5 "First remove the plank from your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye."

If you cannot see: Psalm 19:8c "The commandment of the LORD is pure, enlightening the eyes."

Prov 29:13 "The LORD gives light to the eyes"

Psalm 146:8a "The LORD opens the eyes of the blind"

Stopped by The Captain

You are leaving port under sealed orders and in a troubled period.
You cannot know whither you are going or what you are to do.You cannot know whither you are going or what you are to do.
But why not take the Pilot on board who knows the nature of your sealed orders from the outset,
and who will shape your entire voyage accordingly?
He knows the shoals and the sandbanks, the rocks and the reefs,
He will steer you safely into that celestial harbor where your anchor will be cast for eternity.
Let His almighty nail-pierced hands hold the wheel, and you will be safe.

Peter Marshall

Spiritual Strength Training

And Jesus being full of the Holy Ghost returned from Jordan, and was led by the Spirit into the wilderness, Being forty days tempted of the devil. And in those days he did eat nothing...And when the devil had ended all the temptation...Jesus returned in the power of the Spirit into Galilee..." 

Luke 4:1-2, 13-14

I must've read the first verse at least six times before moving on this morning. That word "full" literally means that Jesus was completely saturated and permeated in His soul with the Holy Spirit's presence. The Spirit then led the Son straight into the wilderness. I'm not a Bible scholar, but the Word doesn't say that the chief or sole purpose was to be tested by the devil.The wilderness was a place where David often found refuge and quietness from his enemy, while Israel fell in sin to the temptations that lie there. According to the scriptures it's not an easy place to live.

But in that difficult place, when a soul remains steadfast in God, resists temptations from flesh and enemy, spiritual strength and power is granted by the Holy Spirit. It doesn't say Jesus had power to resist first. He had the fulness of the Spirit's presence. Yet, in His weakness He swung the weapon He was given and emerged fully equipped with the Spirit's power for the ministry that lie ahead of Him.

His resistance to Satan came with His declaration of what the Word of God was in His life, Who His heart worshiped, and the wisdom He lived by under His Father's authority. If you find yourself in a spiritual wilderness, not led there from sin in your life, be assured that the Lord is with you. And in your weakness, use the same weapon Jesus did. Jam.4:7 "Submit yourselves therefore to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you." Make sure that His declarations are in harmony with your own. There is the key to victory and insight into true "strength training."

1 Tim. 4:8 "For bodily exercise profits little: but godliness is profitable unto all things, having promise of the life that now is, and of that which is to come." 

Eph 6:10-11 "Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might. Put on the whole armor of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil."

Hidden Hearts

I've had "Bleeding Hearts" growing in my garden for as many years as we've been in our house. I love watching the heart shape flowers emerge, quickly grow, then the tear drop descend from its base. God writes majestic poetry in creation. Small illustrative sermons that reveal volumes about His character, His ways, His love and His purposes. I think it's why I'm enamored by the words and paintings of Lillias Trotter so much. Have you ever noticed that if you pluck one of those bleeding heart flowers and tear it open, there is another heart tucked within, firmly attached to the apparent tear drop that descends outwardly? 

It's what I'd love my own heart to be like. That when the Spirit of Jesus in me grieves, His tears break through my own and I weep because He weeps. It's interesting...the Lord created the nectar of that flower to be so sweet, that timid and easily frightened hummingbirds find strength when they drink of it.   

2 Cor. 4:7a "But we have this treasure in earthen vessels..."

"They tell me I must bruise

The rose's leaf,

Ere I can keep and use

Its fragrance brief.

They tell me I must break

The skylark's heart,

Ere her cage song will make

The silence start.

They tell me love must bleed,

And friendship weep,

Ere in my deepest need

I touch that deep.

Must it be always so

With precious things?

Must they be bruised and go

With beaten wings?

Ah, yes! by crushing days,

By caging nights, by scar

Of thorn and stony ways,

These blessings are!"

- From Edith Schaeffer in her book "Affliction"

Food for Thought

I'm not sure what you call those "rules of life" that everyone seems to know by the time you get to adulthood, but I violated one of the chief commands. "Thou shalt not grocery shop on an empty stomach." There's some kind of "alteration" that happens initially to your senses and then an "altar-ation" occurs between you and food.

Peanut butter cups transform into an invaluable protein. The smell of freshly baked bread makes you pick up artisan loaves that cost more than filet mignon. You become convinced that you will make, bake, try and fry foods that in reality, will never see the light of day until you dust the pantry years later.  Items that repulsed you with their 26-letter chemical ingredients now seem to draw you like a tractor beam while fixated on the box's embellished photo. You believe every promise (Slim Fast?), visit every sample table (Spam what?), and focus on the miles you just earned by charging all of it on your Visa.  Hunger...right feeling...wrong timing.

On the contrary, I found myself sitting in front of my Bible not too long ago asking the Lord to stir my hunger. Not the kind of hunger for sweet imitations of His truth nor misapplied promises that may never see the light of day. Not a hunger for tainted interpretations of Who Jesus is that embellish a certain characteristic of His nature. I didn't want to only sample His delicacies through devotionals either. I asked Jesus if He could stir a ferocious appetite deep within my heart that nothing on earth would satisfy but Him. For His righteousness, relationship, and the revelation of the kingdom I am to pursue above all. It was a prayer He faithfully answered...so let's feast today!

"For He satisfies the longing soul and fills the hungry soul with goodness."

Ps. 107:9

"Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness; for they shall be filled."

Matt. 5:6

This is our Jesus

"Jesus called His disciples and said to them, "I have compassion on the multitude, because they have now continued with Me three days and have nothing to eat. And if I send them away hungry to their own houses, they will faint on the way; for some of them have come from afar."  - Mark 8:1b-3

This is our Jesus. He can look at a multitude of faces but see individual hearts. The people said "No man ever spake like this man (Jn.7:46)." They were amazed at His teachings because He taught them as one having authority (Lk.4:32). They were used to hearing the words of the law that came through Moses, but when they heard Jesus, He brought them grace and truth (Jn.1:17). "Everyone spoke well of him and was amazed by the gracious words that came from his lips" (Lk. 4:22a). The grace that would tell a leper that He wanted to touch and heal him. The grace that would tenaciously defend a woman covered in shame from sin and yet would cause shame to fall on her accusers. Jesus spoke the truth that set people free from their sin, their burdens, their despair, their hopelessness. He spoke the truth that gave them peace as they'd never experienced before.

No wonder they would rather follow Jesus than eat. He was feeding a place in their soul that they did not know they hungered for until His words fell upon the tables of their heart. Some traveled from far away but their distance from home could not keep them away. They didn't have food and their stomachs demanded attention but their spirits had never had such a feast. They forsook all of life's basic necessities to follow after Jesus. 

This is our Jesus. That knows what we need before we ask Him (Matt. 6:8). And when we "seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, then all of these things will be added to us (Matt. 6:33)" He saw the crowd and His heart was moved by love. He saw their individual needs and was going to meet that need. The people left Jesus after their spirit and bellies were filled to overflowing. 

"And the grace of our Lord was exceeding abundant 

with faith and love which is in Christ Jesus." 

1 Tim. 1:14

"The LORD of hosts will prepare a lavish banquet for all peoples on this mountain...And it will be said in that day, Behold, this is our God for whom we have waited that He might save us. This is the LORD for whom we have waited; Let us rejoice and be glad in His salvation.” 

Isa. 25:6a, 9

"Amazing Grace"

"Honey, close your eyes."

"But why mommy?"

"So when we pray, you can shut out the world and focus on Jesus."

Once her little eyes squeezed shut, a pint-sized heart poured out gallons of blessings upon everything she held dear.

I remembered that this morning when I read Acts 9 about Saul's conversion on the way to Damascus. I wondered if that's why Jesus chose to make him blind when He confronted Saul's rampage of religious sin. Thinking himself wise and zealous in his torment of the bride of Christ, the One he truly persecuted intercepted his plans, confronted his sin, then struck him with complete blindness. The Pharisaical behemoth now needed to have someone hold his hand. He who led others down the path of dead legalism was brought to a halt and forced to sit in Light-induced darkness.

The world is now shut out from Saul's view. His only sight is what happens in his memory, the imaginations of his heart, and whatever might be played across the screen of his thoughts from God. Three days with his eyes forced closed. Verse 11 tells us "And the Lord said (to Ananias), 'Arise and go...to one called Saul of Tarsus: for, behold, he prays."Basically, "Go to this once angry madman, because look...take notice...he's praying." A broken heart is a magnet to God. Repentance is the key to unlock clarity of sight to the blind. Paul would later right in Romans 2:19-21"Are you confident that you yourself are a guide of the blind, a light of them which are in darkness...an instructor...a teacher...with a form of knowledge and the truth of the law? You which teach another, don't you teach yourself?" He thought he saw when he was blind, but when the Light blinded him, he saw.

Even Jonah the prophet decided he didn't like God's ways of grace and mercy and had to be swallowed by darkness. It was only when he prayed, that he was spit out to proceed in a new direction.

I closed my eyes and thanked the Lord for sight. Then asked him if there was any area of blindness in my perspective that I'd brought on by my own sin. I'm still praying. He knows my heart. And if there is, then I trust He will allow the scales to fall so I can see again with a holy perspective. That's much better than having to be spewed.

Wanna close your eyes with me?

Daddy, just be a man!

As I typed away on my laptop, reverberations of monkey sounds mingled with a little girl's laughter, hovered in the background. It was "Daddy! Will you just be a man, please?!" that made me look up.

Somewhere in the midst of the pseudo-circus, my daughter had gotten tired of Daddy doing a great King Kong, Curious George, monkey something-or-other and requested authenticity. Stop acting like you're not and just be what you are.

Aren't we like that? We crave authenticity from others. Facades and veneers only go so far in relationships. It's a funny thing but oftentimes, the closer we get to another person, the more we want them to be genuine while we'll put up a wall of defense until we think it's safe for us to honestly peek out. It's the authenticity...the revelation of truth (if it's good)...that will make us feel safe.

Jesus never lived a second of His life outside of truth. He never pretended to be something He was not. His Presence exposed the facade of the Pharisees and He openly called them super clean death containers; an appearance of purity and holiness on the outside but filthy, corrosive death on the inside. If Christ lives in us, and Jesus is the Truth (Jn.14:6), then He will want us to walk, speak, live, worship, and love in honesty at all times (Jn.4:24, Ep.4:15, Ex.20:16, Pro.12:22, etc).

Progress in our relationship with the Lord requires that we are honest with Him and others. It starts by making unashamed eye contact with Him in prayer and then continuing in honest, unhindered fellowship with Him continually. The ability to be completely transparent with a Savior that knows us thoroughly and loves us continually, is that truth Jesus speaks of that sets us free (Jn.8:32).We will never be free unless we walk in truth. Never.

Look at Jesus. Look at the cross. Look at the price He paid for our freedom from sin. All truth with dying love.

So may the truth of God, that speaks of the love of God, set you free in God, so that we may walk in truth before others. And may your genuineness with others, display Jesus and His love, so that walls fall and authenticity rolls out the red carpet of salvation for all who need the Lord. Or even, those who know the Lord, but have not walked in freedom since they have not walked in truth.

Now say that three times fast.

Do You Have Your Pilot's License?

"I know, O LORD, that a man's way is not in himself, Nor is it in a man who walks to direct his [own] steps." Jer. 10:23

 I don't remember which flight I was on, nor where I was going, when I looked up from the magazine I was reading to see a pilot fast asleep in the row ahead of me. What would  YOUR first thought be? Yeah, mine too. I thought "Wow, I'm sure his hand is totally numb from that awkward position."

Ok, so maybe yours were more along the line of, "I wonder who's flying the plane?" or "Praise the Lord for the auto pilot button," or something along the obvious. But while I tossed around all kinds of one-liners in my head for self-amusement, the Lord interrupted my thoughts and said "Shannon, I'd like you to be like this pilot." 

He began to speak to me about how I wanted to take over the "cockpit" of my life and navigate where I was going, control the speed or pace of my circumstances, as well as determining the final destination of my current trial. I was experiencing a lot of painful turbulence in my life and just like the sudden drop that comes with hitting a massive air pocket, I did NOT like the sense of losing control. I didn't realize, but the Lord did, that I was fearful of a devastating crash.

But as the verse says...it isn't in us, by nature, with our finite, limited-range, obstructed and myopic view of life, to know the best path for us to take. The Lord definitely was not behind the old bumper sticker that read "God is my Co-Pilot." Instead, He repeats Himself throughout the Bible, with verses like Prov. 3:5, 6 "Trust in the LORD with all your heart, And lean not on your own understanding, In all your ways acknowledge Him, And He shall direct your paths." Psalm 32:8 "I will instruct you and teach you in the way which you shall go: I will guide you with my eye."

The best position for any of us is like this pilot...completely at rest knowing the Lord is in control. Trust only knows how to produce rest. Trust...lean...pray and acknowledge...then rest as He directs the course.
           Even through storm clouds.
                                                      Even through turbulence. 

"Then they are glad because they are quiet; So He guides them to their desired haven." 

Psalm 107:30

Note To Self, "The Lord is Here"

As I looked into the mirror while brushing my teeth, the bags under my eyes looked like a luggage set.

Socks off and PJ's on, I slid across the terrain of our king-size bed and wrapped my arm around my husbands ribs. Then, like the start of an old-time movie reel, my thoughts began to splash across the screen of my mind. Replays of the events of the day quickly led to heart-breaking news from a phone call I'd received. Then the video switched to display every worst-case scenario based on that phone call. I quickly grabbed hold of those thoughts and began to cry out to the Lord, "This is too much for me Lord. Please pour out your grace and mercy for this trial...it's just too much."

As Scott pulled up the sheets around his chin, I started to ask him, "Honey, could you please ask the Lord..." to which I heard a familiar voice interrupting my thoughts, "I'm right here. Why are you asking him to talk to Me?"

The sudden realization that Jesus was closer to me than my husband and the absurdity that I would ask anyone else to be a mediator for me made me smile. I said "Sorry" to the Lord and "Never mind" to Scott. Then proceeded to pray until I fell asleep.

The Lord didn't answer or speak again that night concerning the things in my heart. He didn't need to. But somewhere during the day, in the midst of my hurt, how easily I'd forgotten the reality of His Presence. The promise of His nearness. The tender reassurance that He draws close to the broken-hearted. His ear is open to our cry.

"He shall call upon me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him." Ps.91:15 

May you rest in the comfort that there is no one on the earth closer or more loving than your Jesus.

Personal Invitation...

Heaven's Arsenal

No. You aren't hallucinating. This is a new post. I only have a small speck of time, but in lieu of our church website getting a huge makeover, how could I let the women's ministry look so unkempt? I thought I'd take a moment to share something that the Lord spoke to my heart a couple of weeks ago. It still echoes in my thoughts throughout the day and I pray it might encourage someone as it did me.

A very special friend of mine was getting married out-of-state and it would require more than 9 hours to drive there. Nine hours of being alone with no meals to cook, no messes to clean up, no dog to yell at, no wood stove to maintain, no email to check...oh, I better get back to my point. It was the first time in almost 4 years that has happened. Better than a spa treatment.

Halfway to my final destination, I began to pour out my heart to the Lord about many personal situations I was going through. The tears (little ones) began to start. Then I prayed for my husband, our family, then many trials that were happening in the ministry and with people we dearly love.

All of the sudden, I saw in my thoughts, a huge rock made of flint. A hammer-type tool came down and hit it hard and a huge piece of flint flew off. Then another blow. Then a blow from a rock, then something else. The blows came from every direction and hit all over that hunk of flint. Then it stopped and a hand uncovered what remained. There was an arrow head, a spear head, and all sorts of like instruments. The hand picked up the arrow head and attached it to a shaft and then tucked it into a quiver. As well the other instruments with what they required. Then the Lord said, "Shannon, for many years you have prayed that I would make you into a sharp instrument. An arrow in My quiver. A sharp threshing instrument. And that the Word in your mouth would be sharp. You've prayed to not get dull in any area of the spirit. Every blow that hits your life, no matter where it comes from, how it comes, or who delivers it...even when from the enemy...is merely being used to sharpen you. Then sharper you become, the more aerodynamic you are when facing the contrary winds of adversity and resistance. The tempest will not blow you backward. And so it is with all of your brothers and sisters you've been praying for.  They are being hit, but they are being sharpened...for the warfare will increase."

You know, when the Lord blesses us unexpectedly with His perspective and His reassurance, it is overwhelming. Though the vast majority of times, He wants us to walk by faith and not sight. To trust and not fear. To hold fast to His promises and His Word despite our feelings and circumstances. Yet, every now and then, He breaks through to reinforce us and infuse His strength in our weakness in the battle. I've been battle-weary.

If you are also, I've already prayed that the Lord will use this to speak to you as well. Here are a few scriptures that the Lord referred to and that I have prayed over for many years now.

Isa. 41:15 - "Behold, I will make thee a new instrument having teeth: thou shalt thresh the mountains, and beat them small, and shalt make the hills as chaff."

Matt. 13:15 - "For this people's heart is waxed gross, and [their] ears are dull of hearing, and their eyes they have closed..."

Isa. 49:2 - "And he hath made my mouth like a sharp sword; in the shadow of his hand hath he hid me, and made me a polished shaft; in his quiver hath he hid me;"

God's Journal

This was a post from Proverbs 31 Ministries on February 2. It was so precious to me after speaking only hours ago to someone whose father had Alzheimer's and mother has dementia. I pray you're blessed as well.
    

The Book of Days

Ariel Allison Lawhon, She Reads Co-Director

"All the days ordained for me were written in
Your book before one of them came to be."
Psalm 139:16b (NIV)

They say that smell is the sense most linked to memory. And I know this to be true. The earthy aroma of geraniums transports me to a porch in west Texas where my grandmother tended flowers with the hands that had worked the land her entire life. I see her, water hose dangling from her fingers, spraying the heat and dust from the cobblestone patio. Washing away the residue of a hot afternoon.

The memories of my childhood are bound up in a woman whose name, Ellen, means "shining light." Yet most of those memories are now forgotten to her. Stolen by an illness that I once called "Old Timers Disease." And she laughed at that, back then, when I was all elbows and knees and teeth. Back when she told me that her father suffered from Alzheimer's. The thief of memory.

The diagnosis came early last fall, just as her flower garden began to die, the red petals of her geraniums crisping around the edges, falling away. I now live the great sadness of seeing her slip into the haze of Alzheimer’s, that shining light in her eyes replaced by confusion. And I wonder where her memories go.

Shelling peas with her grandchildren on the back porch.

Cracking open a watermelon and teaching me to spit the seeds across the yard.

Burying her second child, a little girl named Kathy, at the age of three.

Her wrinkled hand tracing the lines of Amazing Grace as we stand and sing the benediction.

Weddings and funerals and the births of grandchildren.

Her own husband of forty-plus years, gone on before her.

All these precious moments of a life falling away, like petals in an autumn frost. Is God catching them as they escape her mind? Holding them in His palm? Does He record them with a tender hand, each memory pressed between the pages of time? Will they one day be restored to her? Do our memories belong to us alone, or are they so special to God that He takes pains to keep track of each and every one?

In Psalm 139:16 we read the startling truth that every moment of our lives has been recorded by a knowing God. "Your eyes saw my unformed body; in Your book all my days were recorded, even those which were purposed before they had come into being."

God has already written down every moment of my grandmother’s life in His book. He's done the same for me and for you as well. Our moments are precious to Him. The times we've knelt in prayer and shouted in praise. Tears and laughter. Celebration and sorrow. None will be lost forever. Not by us and certainly not by the God who ordered each moment before we were even born.

This spring I will fill my back patio with geraniums and I will inhale the scent of my grandmother. I will remember for her, until the day she sits beside her Lord and He opens His book to read the story of Ellen, a woman whose light shines brightly.

Dear Lord, thank You that my days are not forgotten to You. Each one is so important that You wrote it down, with Your own hand. My name is in Your book and Your love is written across every page of my life. For all the days that I have left, may I remember Your with the same passion that You remember me. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.